GETTING THINGS DONE...

Getting some things done...finally. It seems like forever since I had tried to organize anything around the house. There is always so much to do, but I must confess with all of the re-runs on TV, it's amazing how much more time there is to tidy up around the house. Hmmm...

I've been much more serious about my writing projects over the past year and over the past month, I've realized that I'm serious about revising my entire novel. I've had much help from a faithful Obi-wan and feedback from others at "The Notebored." I just can't say enough about joining a writing group if you're serious about starting and finishing a novel or any writing project for that matter. I like the Notebored because it has a little something for everyone.

I've been focusing on the basics/foundation over the past year, and I see a difference in the quality of my writing, and although I have a long way to go, I am really excited about it. Sure I've been progressing but I've always given myself an out to stop the process. That's what has changed for me. I've made up my mind that I'm taking it to the next level and becoming serious in at least completing a revised draft of my book, one way or the other.

But for some reason, my mind had been working over-time on worry. Although there were some work issues that helped play into this, it also ties in to my last posts of letting go, letting God. I think this has been a learning experience to draw closer to God. There have been too many things to call a coincidence. I really feel this is a test to hand over what I can't control to Him and draw closer to Him. Unfortunately I had been failing the test or maybe a better word is challenge. I would think about the problem over and over until I was either in full-fledged panic attack or at the very least very uncomfortable as my heart raced. Sure I'd pray but as I had stated in previous posts, it wasn't enough because I wasn't working at my relationship with God nor was I trusting Him. So I would try to stay busy to keep my mind off the problem that was bothering me, but I was still at a state of unrest. So what's changed?

When I feel insecure and start to worry in that dead-end loop (you know the one where you replay scenarios over and over with no end in sight), I tell myself to stop. And then I actually say quietly out loud, "Help me, Lord. I can't handle this. Please show me the way." Or depending upon the situation, "Lord, I can't control this. Let your will be done." Sounds so simple doesn't it? But it's not the words that are important, it's believing/trusting that God will actually help in any situation. I could pray to ask God to help me, but if I don't believe that he is in control and will show me the way, then the words mean nothing. Is this anything new? Nope, I know what I need to do, but the devil and my sinful nature lead me astray and once again I would struggle to find Jesus' hand along my daily walk. All we need to do is call out to him and reach with arms outstretched and He is there, even if the place seems too dark and far to make contact with our Creator.

More importantly, there are times when I feel dark forces at work...yes, I am lazy and choose not to do the things I need in order to remain close with God, but there are also times when Satan is at work leading me astray. It is a battle and we shouldn't forget that. When this happens, I say just a few words, but it works FAST. "Leave me, Satan." Sounds silly, I know, but it is amazing how quickly I find God's peace and comfort. If only I could be strong all of the time! But I am weak!

I pray for strength, wisdom and guidance to do God's will. Who is it that said to be careful what you pray for? I think God has been showing me the way, but I just didn't want to follow him either because I was too scared and disillusioned by evil and letting my weakness rule my spirit. I'm still not sure if God would say that I'm even close to where he wants me to be at this point. I go to my Lord and Savior asking forgiveness for my weakness and continue trying. It's all about faith and trust.

I wonder if I could get a tape recorder with this message plugged into my brain. I haven't seen one of those at Best Buy. Darn.

Proverbs 3:5-8
Trust in the Lord with all of your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths. Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the Lord and depart from evil. It will be health to your flesh and strength to your bones.